


Breathe For You

by weneebebe



Category: K-pop, Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Everybody Else Knows They're In Love, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Happy Ending, Idiots in Love, Light Angst, Love Confessions, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, Requited Love, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-19
Updated: 2020-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:28:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25996741
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/weneebebe/pseuds/weneebebe
Summary: Hoseok and Kihyun have been friends, roommates, teammates for years - always by each other’s side, like each other’s attentive shadow. They’ve never really spoken about their closeness; they never needed to. Until they have to.
Relationships: Lee Hoseok | Wonho/Yoo Kihyun
Comments: 25
Kudos: 56





	1. Worries in the Dark

**Author's Note:**

> this was written specially for a friend on twitter!   
> thank you for the minggom, Mae!<3

It had been another grueling, tearful elimination night for the remaining singers, rappers, and dancers - steps heavy as lead, they slunk back to their dorm and helped the single boy pack his things. He would be moved to another dorm, and his fate with the company would be decided another day. Understandably, the mood was quiet and slow - after all, who wants to celebrate making it through another round of eliminations when someone as close to you as a brother is forced to leave your side? There would only be two more eliminations, and a new group would emerge like a phoenix from the ashes of the spectacle that the agency had created. There was hesitation, fear, and sadness in the air.

Hyunwoo, the oldest boy in the dorm and the one who had been unanimously declared the leader by the boys early on in this adventure, had sent everyone off to bed once they’d eaten and said a final farewell. But it didn’t take long before two bodies began to stir and grow restless.

“Hoseokie-hyung, are you awake?” Kihyun asked, voice a careful whisper in the pitch-black night. He shifted in his bunk bed and tried to adjust his eyes, tried to fix them to the form of the older boy across the room where he thought he’d heard a noise. His eyes, acclimating to the light, were hopeful and round.

A muffled reply came quickly, to Kihyun’s relief. “Mmm,” Hoseok groaned. “Can’t sleep,” he whispered back. “Want some ramen?”

That made Kihyun laugh softly. No matter what, it seemed to the boys that food was always an apt solution. “Yeah, sure,” he slid carefully off of his mattress and stood in the middle of the room, between their bunks. Hoseok climbed down off the top, careful of the creaks he’d long-since memorized so he didn’t alert the sleeping Jooheon beneath him. Hoseok took Kihyun’s hand and led him out of the bedroom and towards the kitchen.

The moonlight bathed the entire space in a gentle silver glow, and the boys felt almost comforted by the pretty stillness of the open space. Free to speak above a whisper now, far enough away from their deeply sleeping teammates, Kihyun cleared his throat and leaned against the counter as Hoseok rummaged for packets of ramen. “I haven’t slept well in days,” he admitted, sighing. “I’m so tired all the time, but I can’t sleep.” He looked plaintively at Hoseok as if to say, _can’t we just fast forward and see who makes it?_

Hoseok looked at the younger man then and his eyes betrayed their understanding. He set out the packets of ramen on the counter and shut the cabinet door; running a tired hand through his hair, he returned Kihyun’s sigh. “I know what you mean,” he admitted. “Every part of me aches. I wish we could just fast-forward through all of this and be done with it.”

Kihyun’s eyes grew wide, and he momentarily forgot his stress. “I was just thinking that,” he smiled gently.

Hoseok smiled at that. “Really?” He asked, amused. “I guess we really must be soulmates then,” he added quietly.

Kihyun hadn’t caught that. “Hmm?” He asked, but Hoseok shrugged and waved his hand.

“Never mind,” he shook his head. “I’m just tired,” he explained.

They cooked their midnight ramen in relative silence - comfortable, familiar.

*

Hoseok tried to stifle a laugh. “What do you mean, you don’t know what the bases are?” He bumped Kihyun’s shoulder gently, teasing.

Kihyun slurped at his noodles, pretending not to be bothered. “Don’t look at me like that,” he shot back, lips curling into a smile of their own. _“Bases._ How American of you, Seok. I’m surprised.”

It was Hoseok’s turn to try and pretend not to be bothered; he crunched on what was left of the pickled turnips. “Okay, okay,” he admitted. “I saw it on an English tv show,” all the sweet bravado had gone from his voice.

Kihyun refilled Hoseok’s glass of water. “What does it matter, anyway?” He wondered aloud, more to himself than to the older boy. “We won’t be allowed to date anyone,” he paused for a moment. “If we make it, and debut. We won’t have any privacy.”

Hoseok was caught off guard by that. “Do you think about that stuff a lot?” He asked, slurping up the last of his noodles and looking at the other boy through his lashes over the rim of the bowl.

Kihyun sighed. “About debuting? How can you not think about it?” He wondered at the older boy, and suddenly his face changed - Hoseok could see for the first time just how tired Kihyun looked; how much the show was eating away at him. It made his heart ache; he slid his chair closer to him and wrapped his arm around his shoulders.

“It’s going to be okay, you know,” he reassured him - at that moment, though, it felt like he was reassuring himself, too. “We’re going to make it. I can feel it,” he said sweetly. “Just a few more weeks of this. Then…”

“Then _what?”_ Kihyun shot back, with a little more venom than he’d anticipated. “Sorry,” he corrected himself. “I just. I want this to be over. I want to sing. I want to be with all of you,” he looked Hoseok in the eyes, then, and he nestled into the older boy’s neck. “I just want to be with you.”

Hoseok didn’t know what to say to that; he knew the fatigue was getting at both of them. “Don’t worry,” he curled his fingers through Kihyun’s soft hair and let him rest against his neck. “I won’t leave your side.”

The pair sat still for what seemed like hours, neither wanting to break their little spell and let reality in.


	2. I’ll Be Your Mirror Instead

KH: where are you today?   
KH: with everybody off doing their own thing I thought you’d be in the studio   
KH: but when I checked, you weren’t there

HS: I’m just finishing up at the gym  
HS: I left a note on the fridge   
HS: did you not see it?

KH: of course! I should have guessed you were there  
KH: the note must have fallen off  
KH: I can pick you up if you want^^

HS: yeah, okay^^   
HS: can I ask you something?

KH: sure, what’s up?

HS: be honest

KH: always^^  
KH: what is it?

HS: should I stop going to the gym?

KH: you love the gym  
KH: why would you want to stop?

HS: idk, but… you see the comments online  
HS: he’s too manly! He’s not an idol he’s a monster!  
HS: I love the gym, but  
HS: idk what I should do

KH: fuck those comments  
KH: people are just jealous of you   
KH: you’re gorgeous, Seok

HS: now you’re just saying that

KH: I mean it  
KH: you’re so delicate when you dance   
KH: and when you sing  
KH: and you fit so perfectly with us  
KH: don’t listen to them

HS: it’s hard not to   
HS: they’re always so loud

KH: I’m almost at the gym now  
KH: come out soon  
KH: let’s go get something sweet

HS: you’re already sweet enough for me

KH: but you can’t eat me!  
KH: come on, let me treat you   
KH: it’s not every day we actually have free time

HS: okay^^   
HS: I’ll be out in a few minutes

Hoseok set his phone down on the bench and sighed. Beads of water from his shower still clung to his shoulders, but he quickly slipped his t-shirt on. His heart leapt a little knowing that Kihyun would be waiting for him downstairs; it was a nice feeling, to be waited for. To be wanted. Not that he didn’t feel that way most days - he loved his members more than anything in the world; but for some reason, today, the desire to be seen, really _seen_ \- it clawed at him. He shook his head as if to dispel the creeping thoughts, and shut the locker door. Pulling out his phone from his back pocket, he smiled to see that Kihyun had sent him a silly-face selca from outside the front entrance.

Making his way out of the lobby, the day was bright and warm, and the sun on his face felt like a gentle hug. Hoseok was confused for the briefest moment when he did not immediately see Kihyun waiting for him where the photo had been taken. He looked around, eyes wide and childlike. “Kihyunnie?” He questioned the air.

“Boo!” Kihyun leapt at him in a big hug from behind a large, manicured shrub. Hoseok clasped the slim man in his arms tightly. “Did I scare you?” He asked sweetly.

Hoseok laughed. “You did a bit, actually,” he admitted. “You’re such a child,” he smiled and ruffled Kihyun’s hair.

“You love it,” he countered, puffing his cheeks out slightly, knowing that Hoseok could never resist his cute face.

Hoseok took the bait and pinched Kihyun’s cheek, eliciting a fake squawk of pain from the vocalist. “You’re right, I do,” he agreed. “So, where are you taking me now?”

Kihyun, not missing a beat, linked arms with Hoseok and squeezed, excited. “I’m taking you to the cutest cafe I know,” he said, voice affecting a story-telling tone. “It’s just opened up, actually. It’s a little bit of a walk, but because the day is so pretty, I didn’t think you would mind.” He looked up at Hoseok for confirmation, and his eyes shone in the pretty sunlight.

Hoseok’s pretty, beatific smile made Kihyun’s heart jump. “I don’t mind, Ki,” he agreed as they began to walk together, arm in arm. “It’s a beautiful day.”

They walked in a happy silence, stopping occasionally to greet surprised fans who recognized them along their walk.

*

The cafe was, blessedly, rather empty - having ordered a small selection of cakes and their favourite iced coffees, the pair sat at a table towards the back; the cafe’s pretty wooden partitions covered in vines and fake flowers, affording them privacy. For a while, they talked of everything and nothing; joking about practice, about Hyunwoo’s snoring, Minhyuk’s capriciousness. When there was a little comfortable lull in their conversation, Kihyun decided to gently broach the subject again. “Hoseok, you know how beautiful you are, don’t you?” He asked softly, leaning in on his elbows.

Hoseok cocked his head to the side and looked down, suddenly bashful. “You don’t have to call me that,” he replied somewhat weakly. “Just to make me feel better.”

“I’m not,” Kihyun ruched for Hoseok’s hand on the table and gently held it. “People will always find something to criticize. Have you read what they think about me? I’m too thin, I’m too short, I’m too much like a woman…” Kihyun scoffed as if the last comment had gotten under his skin. “None of it matters,” he corrected himself and looked into Hoseok’s eyes. “Because the ones who love us will always love us louder than those that like to pick on the things we are insecure about.” He considered his next words carefully. “And we will always love each other, won’t we?” He asked, eyes encouraging Hoseok to respond.

“Yeah,” Hoseok agreed finally. “The way monbebe love us…” he smiled at that. “The way monbebe love us, and the way we all love each other… it’s enough.” He squeezed Kihyun’s hand, a way to show that he understood.

Kihyun sighed. “Hoseok, listen to me,” he turned the older man’s hand in his, thinking. “You are you, and the way you look is… it’s secondary. You have such a good heart, and the way you care for your body is so admirable. The people who criticize you, they’re just jealous of the rest of us.”

“Us?” Hoseok questioned.

Kihyun smiled. “Because we get to see you and hug you and rest on you whenever we want.”

That made Hoseok laugh in earnest. “Lucky you,” he mused, leaning in a little further and squeezing Kihyun’s hand again.

Under the small table, their legs intertwined comfortably and their thighs touched, a gentle warmth radiating from where skin touched skin. In that quiet moment, the air seemed to change; both felt it, but neither of them knew the words to properly define this new feeling that hung in the space between them.

For now, at least, it did not matter.


	3. Liquid Courage

The walls of the dorm were practically vibrating with the energy that bounced off the seven deliriously excited boys - they had clamored back into their apartment worse than a crew of drunk children; whooping and howling, jumping and hugging. _We won,_ Kihyun thought, tears lingering at the corners of his eyes. _We really won. Our first win, at last._

“Get the champaign!” A widely-grinning Minhyuk cooed at everyone and no one in particular, hanging off of Jooheon like an extra limb. “I don’t want to sleep tonight!”

Jooheon laughed and pressed a cartoon kiss, loud and elastic, to Minhyuk’s cheek. “We don’t have champaign, are you crazy?” But Minhyuk was undeterred, and he flung himself off the younger boy and opened the fridge with a flourish that made the rest of them laugh.

They all settled together in the living room around the coffee table, sitting on the floor with their backs resting against the couches - why did they never sit on the couches themselves? Now was not the time to wonder about that - and the reality of things began to set in. Suddenly, the atmosphere changed, and they simply looked at each other, glistening tears waiting at the corners of exhausted eyes. Hyunwoo exhaled like he was holding in all of their breath at once. Before things got too serious, though, Minhyuk came bounding back into the room, arms full of snacks and drinks to share. “Time to celebrate,” he nestled down next to Jooheon, who only beamed with delight. “No cameras, no managers, just us. Finally,” he grinned cheesily and passed out the bottles of soju and bags of chips.

And with that, everyone else let out the breath that they had been holding, too.

*

“As if!” Changkyun roared playfully, shoving Hyunwoo away with a laugh. “I’m not doing that!” He shook his head and puffed out his cheeks. The others, though, weren’t going to let him off so easy.

“You’re the one who chose dare, puppy!” Hoseok reminded him. “So come on, give it a try,” he wiggled his eyebrows playfully. “Do you want some help?” He took a long sip of his cherry soda, and winked. Changkyun went red.

“I can do it myself,” he pouted, getting up from his place on the floor, a little wobbly from drink. He stuck his tongue out and made a cute noise, and walked over to the bare wall across the room. Hesitating, hands on his hips, surveying the space, he took a deep breath and extended his arms, twisting his body into a handstand as he leaned against the wall for support.

The boys began to cheer him on and count down, “Ten, nine, eight, seven, six— ooh!!”

Changkyun couldn’t remain upright for the full time, and he crumpled to the floor with a theatrical groan. “Hyunwoo-hyung, help me!” He yelped with a childish lilt in his voice. Hyunwoo dutifully got up and went to retrieve the tipsy rapper, scooped him in his arms and brought him back to their little circle. He tried to push Changkyun off of him gently, but the maknae wasn’t having it; he nestled further into Hyunwoo’s lap, and amid the cooes of the others, Hyunwoo accepted his fate as the new resting place of their youngest. When Changkyun began to snore, everyone laughed.

It was Kihyun’s turn, now; he pretended to think for a moment, and then realized, motioning to the sleeping rapper, “Kyunie’s passed out, who’s gonna give me my truth or dare?”

“I will!” Minhyuk raised his hand enthusiastically, almost knocking over the open bottle of soju in front of him. “Which do you want?”

Kihyun cocked his head from side to side, half stretching, half thinking about his answer. “Hmm,” he thought aloud. “Dare,” he decided finally. “Why not.” He shot Minhyuk a playfully serious look. _Please don’t make me strip or something,_ he thought quickly.

Now it was Minhyuk’s turn to think. He scanned the room around them to see if inspiration would strike; but his attention was instead captured by how Hoseok seemed to be looking at Kihyun in that moment. _What’s that about?_ He wondered. _He’s looking at him like I used to look at Jooheon before… oh!_ He realized. _Oh._ And then he knew exactly what he wanted to dare his band member. “I dare you,” he said carefully. “To give everyone a kiss,” he narrowed his eyes and held a cushion close to his chest. “Starting with Hoseokie.”

At that, Hoseok immediately averted his eyes. Kihyun went red, surprised that he would be dared to kiss everyone. But, he had to think fast; and decided to try and change the request with some humour. “Everyone?” He asked Minhyuk, trying to be calm. “Even your precious Jooheon?”

At that, thankfully, everyone laughed. But Minhyuk would not be deterred. He looked next to him and squeezed Jooheon’s thigh. “You don’t mind, do you baby? It’s just a game.”

Jooheon shrugged, cheeks full and pink and dimply with drink. “Just this once,” he agreed. “Since it’s for a dare.”

Kihyun’s heart sank; there was no getting out of this. He glanced over at Hoseok, who seemed to be doing everything in his power not to look at him. Kihyun’s heart began to race, and he again tried to diffuse the tension with a joke as he crawled over to Hoseok. “Don’t fall in love with me, okay?” He said, trying to be confident. Hoseok let a half-laugh spill from barely parted lips. Then, Kihyun had an idea. He kissed Hoseok on the cheek, a cartoon-smack of a kiss that made the older boy laugh in earnest.

But that didn’t satisfy Minhyuk, or any of the others - they let out groans of disappointment, playfully slapping the floor beneath them in a drumroll, waiting for him to kiss the vocalist properly. “Come on, do it again!” Minhyuk cheered.

Kihyun gulped. The pair locked eyes - why did this feel so difficult? Between them, in the silence that hung in the air, the cheers and anticipation of the others melting away, their eyes had a conversation.

_Is this… is this really okay?_

_I don’t know._

_This is weird, right?_

_Maybe. Maybe it’s okay._

_Okay,_ Kihyun nodded. _Here I go._ He tilted his head and brought his face a little closer to Hoseok’s, who reciprocated. Their lips just a breath away from each other, the playful cheers from the others died down - Minhyuk had shushed them all, he didn’t want to miss the climax of his plan, after all - and Hoseok closed his eyes, waiting for the kiss. As if automatic, natural, Kihyun gently coaxed Hoseok’s face just a little closer with a gentle hand and finally, their lips touched. _He’s so… soft,_ Hoseok thought as he tried hard not to melt under Kihyun’s touch. Kihyun, temporarily forgetting that there was an audience, brought his hands to Hoseok’s cheeks, guiding him closer, pressing his tongue at the seam of the older boy’s lips; waiting for permission to deepen the kiss. Hoseok parted his lips slowly, and sighed into the embrace. They remained like that for a beat longer than the others were expecting, almost having forgotten the game altogether.

Until Hyunwoo cleared his throat, and made the boys nearly fall over from embarrassment. Their faces each a bright shade of red, a line had squarely been crossed.

But the others didn’t seem to mind at all.

*

The drinking games concluded, and the dorm full of grateful snores, it was almost time for the sun to contemplate rising in the sky; but there were two people who had not yet been blessed with sleep.

Kihyun kept tossing and turning in his bed, and it had become too frustrating to lie flat; so, he carefully, slowly, crept from his room and into the moonlit almost-morning, into the living room and was surprised to see someone already there.

“Hoseokie,” he whispered, addressing the figure lying on the couch, face illuminated by his laptop. “How long have you been out here? I didn’t hear you get up.”

Hoseok sat up on the sofa and patted the cushion next to him. “I’ve been up for ages,” he replied, his voice equally low. “I can’t sleep, even though I’m this tired.” He ruffled his hair, and puffed out his cheeks. “Couldn’t you sleep, either?”

Kihyun sat next to him on the couch, consciously trying not to touch the other man - why? He shook his head, not knowing the answer - and lolled his head on the back of the couch. “No,” he replied.

Hoseok could feel the tension in the air between them. “It was just a game, Ki,” he said after a moment. “We just got… we just got carried away, that’s all.”

Kihyun’s heart sank. _Did we, though? Even though it felt that good?_ He wanted to reply, but instead, he heard himself say, “Just a game…” he sighed. “I guess that’s true. I ended up kissing everyone, I guess I can cross that off my list.”

“That was on your list?” Hoseok joked weakly, gently punching Kihyun’s shoulder. “I never would have guessed that.”

Kihyun laughed at that. “You know what I mean,” he shrugged. “I’ve never kissed a man before tonight, and now I’ve kissed six. That’s gotta be some kind of record,” he could feel the tension slowly escape his body the more he spoke. “Though, I think I have a favourite,” he said before he could stop himself.

It was Hoseok’s turn for his heart to begin to race, now. “You do?” He asked, doing his best to sound disinterested. “So,” he turned his gaze downward, suddenly unable to look Kihyun in the eye. “Who kisses the best?” _Why do I hope the answer is me?_ He wondered. _Where did that even come from?_

Kihyun held tightly to the couch cushion pressed to his chest like a cotton and duck-down shield. “Yeah,” he replied finally, curling his legs underneath him, trying to somehow make himself smaller. “But if I tell you, maybe you’ll be mad,” he curled his lips into a teasing smile.

Hoseok was grateful for the humour, and playfully thwacked the younger man’s leg. “What’s that supposed to mean?” He pretended to be hurt. “I’m a _fantastic_ kisser,” he puffed his cheeks out cutely.

“Yeah,” Kihyun agreed softly. “Yeah, you really are,” he allowed himself a moment of weakness and rested a hand on Hoseok’s thigh, and at last the pair let their eyes meet; embarrassment finally melting away just a little.

Both men knew a line had been crossed; but neither was ready to actually say the words that had begun to claw at both their hearts.

_I like you._

_I like you too._

_What will we do about this, now?_

_I don’t know._

_Let’s just rest here, like this. Until the sun comes up._

_Okay._


	4. Healing Hands, Healing Lips

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *note: song in the beginning is Jonghyun's "White T-Shirt" ^_^ the song Y Si Fuera Ella was covered by Kihyun during No Mercy.

“Come on, it’s definitely my turn to choose the music!” Hoseok whined cutely as the duo meandered into the kitchen.

Kihyun shook the sleep from his eyes - they’d just woken up from a very necessary, well-deserved nap, and had been tasked with cooking dinner for the others while they were out on various other errands. “Fine, fine,” he conceded, “but you better pick something good,” he teased, bumping shoulders with the taller man.

“I have just the song,” Hoseok smiled brightly, scrolling through his phone before settling on something that made his eyes light up.

_It’s all about you, you, you, you,_

_you, you, you, you_

_You, you, you, you_

_Your casual style makes you look even more special_

_Your silhouette provokes my imagination_

_Your slightly messy hair_

_Your body stands out even more_

_It’s your white t-shirt_

_It’s just white t-shirt_

“Get it?” Hoseok laughed. Kihyun made a confused face. Hoseok pulled a little at the hem of Kihyun’s white t-shirt, and suddenly, understanding dawned on the younger man’s placid face.

“Good one,” he agreed. Recognizing the song, Kihyun began to join in and together they weaved about the small kitchen, opening and closing cabinet doors to lay out everything the pair needed in order to make dinner.

Soon, the two men fell into a familiar rhythm - Kihyun chopping the vegetables while Hoseok snuck a few slices for himself; Kihyun pretending not to notice, but still cutting extra for him to snack on. In a comfortable silence, the pair continued to sing along softly to the music Hoseok had chosen for the night - Kihyun had to agree, he’d picked well; the boys all had a soft-spot for Jonghyun’s solo work, after all.

“Do you think you’d ever do another recording of _Y Si Fuera Ella?”_ Hoseok asked, munching on a slice of carrot. “It’s been so long since No Mercy. I’m sure you could do it even better now.” He cocked his head cutely, encouragingly.

Kihyun thought about it for a moment. “I don’t know,” he replied honestly. “I’d like to, but…” his voice trailed off a little.

Hoseok knew what he worried about, and gently poked the younger man’s cheek. “I’m sure he would really love it,” he said softly. “I’m sure he’d love to hear it again.”

At that, Kihyun stopped chopping the vegetables and looked at him, eyes shining, honest. “You think so?” He asked, voice suddenly childlike. “I don’t want to disappoint him.”

“You could never,” Hoseok slipped the noodles into the now-boiling pot of water. “You have the most beautiful voice in the world,” he smiled.

Kihyun blushed, and went back to chopping vegetables. They began to talk of lighter, softer things, continuing to sing along and plan a grand vacation - not that they’d ever be given that much time off without a camera crew involved, but it was still fun to pretend.

Suddenly —

“Ah! Shit,” Kihyun dropped the knife onto the counter and angrily slid it off into the sink, startling Hoseok. He held his hand and hunched over the chopping board in pain. “Fuck, the knife…”

“Ki!” Hoseok carelessly threw the wooden spoon down and instinctively wrapped an arm around Kihyun’s waist. “What happened, are you okay?” He saw thin rivers of blood began to trickle from Kihyun’s palm, and his eyes grew wide. “Oh shit, you cut your hand!” He guided the younger man to the sink and turned the tap on. “Keep your hand under the cold water, okay? I’ll be right back.” With a quick squeeze of his waist and an unthinking, reassuring kiss to Kihyun’s shoulder, Hoseok ran off towards the washroom where the first aid supplies were kept.

Hearing Hoseok clamor around the cabinet, tossing things away while he looked for the bandages and swearing, Kihyun smiled despite the pain. “Found it!” Came the older man’s voice, and soon the vocalist found him right back by his side. “You okay, Ki?” Hoseok asked, gently taking his hand away from under the tap. Examining the wound, he sighed in relief. “It doesn’t seem that deep, you probably won’t need stitches,” he remarked. “I’ll bandage you together and then we can go to the hospital to double-check everything out, if the bleeding doesn’t stop. Okay?” He searched Kihyun’s eyes. Kihyun nodded; it was a sound plan.

Kihyun could see the worry in Hoseok’s eyes, and it made his heart ache. With his free hand, he gently took hold of the back of Hoseok’s neck, and stroked the delicate skin there with his thumb. “I’m okay, Seok,” he reassured him. “It doesn’t hurt that bad.”

“Still,” Hoseok didn’t take his eyes off the task at hand, and continued to wrap the gauze around Kihyun’s palm. “Can’t have you bleeding all over our dinner, can we?” He smirked playfully, relaxing Kihyun.

 _When was the last time we stood so close like this, when it wasn’t for choreography?_ Hoseok wondered in that moment. _I’m close enough to smell his shampoo… it’s nice._ “You smell so good,” he mused, still concentrating on Kihyun’s hand.

It seemed like that little admission was enough to make Kihyun blush, and his heart began to race a little. “Don’t,” he said weakly. “Don’t say things like that,” he stuttered a little. “You’re so… you’re too close,” his voice was small. He looked at Hoseok then, and Hoseok momentarily took his eyes off his task to meet his gaze.

“I’m too… close?” Hoseok parroted back, voice equally soft. He held Kihyun’s hand in his, the job of bandaging him now done - but he didn’t let go. He moved imperceptibly closer; Kihyun did not pull away. “What if…” he considered his next words with great care. “What if I wanted to be closer, Ki?” He asked slowly. The pair looked at each other for a beat longer before Hoseok took Kihyun’s bandaged hand and held it to his chest, drawing the younger man in closer. He pressed on. “What if I want to be closer?” He asked again.

Kihyun swallowed hard, and gave in to the rising blush that crept up his neck and flushed his cheeks. “Seok, what…” he stuttered finally. “What do you mean?” Even though, in truth, he knew what Hoseok wanted. And he’d be lying if he said he didn’t want it too. He did not move from where he stood, instead moving a hair’s breadth closer.

Hoseok took Kihyun’s cheek in his hand and guided their faces close enough to kiss, but not quite; pressing their foreheads together. “I mean,” he said slowly. “I mean this,” he kissed him softly, the sweet taste of the strawberry soda he’d been drinking earlier still clinging to his lips. Kihyun sunk into Hoseok’s arms, the pain from his injury forgotten entirely. He wrapped his arms loosely around Hoseok’s neck, drawing their bodies just a little closer. Hoseok smiled and picked up the slim man easily, setting him down on the counter so Kihyun could wrap his legs around Hoseok’s thighs.

They stayed like that for a few more languid moments, softly kissing, gentle fingers caressing smooth skin. Kihyun was the first to pull back just a little, and he almost regretted the movement - how soft Hoseok’s lips were against his! But he had to ask. “Seok,” he cradled Hoseok’s cheek in one hand, eyes sparkling. “You’re not… we’re not just passing the time, right?” He asked, voice small. “I don’t want to forget about this in the morning.”

Hoseok smiled from the very middle of himself, and kissed Kihyun’s nose. “Neither do I,” he explained. “Ki, I love you…” he searched Kihyun’s eyes for understanding. “I love you more than anyone.”

It was Kihyun’s turn to smile, now. “Do you mean that?” He asked, curling delicate fingers through Hoseok’s hair, his free hand tugging childishly at the hem of his shirt. “Seok, I… I love you too. I think I always have.” His voice more sure now, he continued, “I’m tired of trying to find ways around it.” He took Hoseok’s chin in his hand and kissed him again, deliberate and slow.

Hoseok sighed into the kiss, smiling at Kihyun’s acceptance of his confession. He leaned into him against the kitchen cabinet, and his heart jumped a little when Kihyun’s hands suddenly slipped under his shirt, long fingers exploring the curves of his chest. He responded in kind, a careful hand resting at the waistband of his sweatpants, delicate fingers teasing the sensitive skin of his Adonis belt. Kihyun gasped at the ticklish feeling, but instead of pulling away, he pressed their hips together and tightened his legs’ hold around Hoseok’s thighs.

Hoseok began to tug gently on Kihyun’s shirt, eyes asking him to remove it, and Kihyun was about to obey -

Until the noise of their members returning from the gym and the studio interrupted them.

Instead of shoving him away, Kihyun simply lolled his head against Hoseok’s shoulder and laughed. Hoseok kissed the top of Kihyun’s head, and whispered, “let’s finish this later,” and it made Kihyun shiver a little.

“What’s this?” Minhyuk cooed theatrically, setting down his gym bag on the kitchen floor. “I’m gone five minutes and look at you!” He laughed.

“Wait,” Jooheon surveyed the scene, and saw Minhyuk’s satisfied look. “Did you two finally…?” He puckered his lips, miming a kiss. Hoseok nodded, and Kihyun laughed. “About time,” Jooheon commented sweetly, playfully hitting Minhyuk’s shoulder for embarrassing his members. Then, sharing a quick look with Minhyuk, he called out to the others, “Hey guys, come in here! Hoseokie-hyung and Kihyunnie-hyung finally confessed to each other!”

“Hey!” Hoseok and Kihyun objected in unison - but that only made the situation funnier.

The others finally congregated in the kitchen, all cooes and smiles at the pair, clapping good-naturedly like they’d watched the final scene of some grand play. _Just another day in the Monsta X dorm, huh?_ Kihyun thought to himself, still happily nestled in Hoseok’s arms on the counter. _I wouldn’t give this up for the world._

And then, Hoseok kissed him, and everyone cheered.


End file.
